How to appear less intimidating
We all know of many ways that powerful people can hurt others deliberately.But sometimes powerful people hurt others inadvertently because they underestimate their power and do careless things which cause harms they never expected, and sometimes never notice even after the fact.
In this post, I want to focus in on how false modesty, an emotion I think people sometimes develop as a corrective against arrogance, can actually become a counter-productive kind of With seemingly any power comes the power to hurt.
Sometimes a relatively well-meaning person does not want to superior to other people or, especially, to feel like she is someone who has a lot emotionally invested in being superior to other people.
This is likely due in some part to the various social and moral pressures against feeling better than others that I mentioned at the outset.
While most of us rightly want to be exceptional in some way or another, we often feel a lot of social and moral pressure not to think of ourselves as generally better than others.
And, even more urgently, we feel pressure not to convey to others that we think ourselves superior and not to be primarily by a desire to be generally better than others.
We need to remember that regardless of whether deep down inside we feel ourselves to be inadequate, harmless, or so upstanding as to only be capable of benefitting others, it is always possible that others are nonetheless quite vulnerable to us.